Tinky Disco: Scenes 5-6a


PART 2 OF THE LEITHOLOGY QUINTOLOGY


SCENE 5: The Mash House

The club is empty – Brooklyn is messin about on the decks / enter TC & Stacey

TC
Yo Brooklyn

Brooklyn
TC, my main man, how ya doin

TC
Ready to rave, pal, ready to rave

Brooklyn
& who’s this little bundle of buzziness?

Stacey
I’m Stacey

Brooklyn
Well hello – I’m Brooklyn, it looks like you’re our first punter of the night

Stacey
I aint payin,’ I’m with him

Brooklyn
But…

TC
Don’t fight it mate, you won’t win

Brooklyn
OK, the more the merrier I suppose

TC
Here’s them pills

Brooklyn
Nice one

TC
That’ll be a twenty-spot please

Brooklyn
Can I give it you at the end of the night, along with your fee

TC
Fucks sake

Brooklyn
You’ll get your money, don’t fret – in the meantime its a free bar for us – there’s a wee fridge behind the decks – whaddaya want – we’ve got cans of lager, cider, there’s even a bottle of tequila

TC
Just a can of lager ta

Stacey
I’ll have a tequila

Brooklyn
I can’t find any ices & slices

Stacey
I prefer it straight, its fine, just give me the bottle

Brooklyn
Whatever… here’s yours TC

TC
Thank you very much

TC & Brooklyn open & chink their cans / Stacey starts swigging the tequila

Brooklyn
So here are the decks, yeah – top quality technics – the bass is buzzing

TC
Buzzin

Brooklyn
I meant booming, proper in your guts stuff

TC
I’ll put a record on, then, check it out

Stacey
{singing}
One tequila two tequila three tequila four
Five tequila six tequila, watcha waiting for
Six tequila, seven tequila, eight tequila more
Nine tequila, ten tequila, then you hit the floor

Brooklyn
She’s off her head, her

TC
I don’t mind, I like the feisty ones

Brooklyn
Feisty! She’s a borderline roaster!

TC
{putting on a record}
That sounds absolutely bangin – that top end is tiop niotch

Brooklyn
It certainly is – you ready to go

TC
Easy

Brooklyn
OK, I’ll start letting them in – see you on the flipside brother


SCENE 6a: The Mash House (continued)

T.D.S

TC
Check it, check it, check it

Phew, phew got nuffin to do
Just an egg macmuffin hat attitude
Gonna put on some random records
& get down to the groove

Friends, friends followin trends
I heard miss disco’s making amends
She gotta damn foxy symphony
She gonna sing that song for you

Down at the T-I-NKY D-I-S-C-O
Freaky Superfly Disco Show
Down at the Tinky Disco
Yes its the Tinky Disco Show, so come on

You’ve got to find your vibe
You got to share your high

Stacey
Fucked up, big it up
Got the pills & the files & they’re backed up
I’m a pretty little buttercup
In my summer top all see thro sequinfied
Dont stop rev it up
Whatv ya got tip top on yer laptop
Ah tequila ceiling feeling like its cyanide
Ah tequila ceiling feeling like its cyanide
Ah tequila ceiling feeling like its cyanide

Enter Hamish, Krissie & Kate

 

 

 

 

TC
Hi! Hi! Call from Mumbai
I’ve never heard nuttin like this guy’s
Gonna ring round the company
They gonna get down to the groove

Flow, flow, kinky Kyoto
She lettin’ it hang & lettin it grow
Gotta facebook her friends
& set their statuses to you

Enter Larry the Axe & City

Down at the T-I-N-K-Y D-I-S-C-O
Freaky Superfly Disco Show
Down at the Tinky Disco
Yes its the Tinky Disco Show, so come on

You’ve got to find your tribe
You got to share your style

Well I’m the real TC thats me
I aint your normal form of MC
I’m a true groove buster voodel chile
Ripping it max with lots of style

I’m Scotland’s top hip-hot outfit
Lyrical bandit doing my bit
Musical genius jammin guitar
Hear the new disco wherever you are, yeah

We’re never gonna let the weekend stop
We gonna freak & pop we gonna freak & pop

Enter Nelson & Lily

Nelson
It’s the Tinky Disco
It’s the Tinky Disco
It’s the Tinky Disco
It’s the Tinky Disco

Lily
I put on my dancing shoes
My soul it glows like a glitterball
These neon lights they shine for me & you
Lets his the floor my friend
Gonna dip trip slide until the party ends
This Tinky Disco sets me free

Enter The General, Brenda & India

TC
Hands, hands, show me those hands
We’re dancing naked down on the sands
Gotta wee foxy flavour & a fist of fireflies
Crawl, crawl, walk or you’ll fall
The tides gone out the towers are tall
There’s a full moon approaching
& its time to phantasize

Down at the T-I-NKY D-I-S-C-O
Freaky Superfly Disco Show
Down at the Tinky Disco
Yes its the Tinky Disco Show, so come on

We’re never gonna let the weekend stop
We gonna freak & pop we gonna freak & pop


THE CONCHORDIA FOLIO

“Its worth a pop, right, to try & knock that Shakespeare
Off his feffin’ perch!”

 

Interview: Damian Beeson Bullen


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