The Stand, Glasgow

9th October

Joe Heenen was the compere for the night’s line-up, and he launched straight into heckling the front rows, in particular a young woman whose out celebrating her birthday with her mates, ‘So, do you have a tight fanny then?’ Most women don’t mind getting the arse ripped out them if there is a reciprocal male genitalia slagging going on, but unfortunately the banter was a tad one-sided by Heenan’s continual harking back to said lady’s privates throughout all his appearances in between acts. Come on Joe, why go all passive-aggressive-stalker-psycho on her when there was much more fun to be had in the form of Haley, the History and Politics student who cited her favorite politician as David Cameron – a classic comedy moment of silence ensued while the entire room computes before reacting with expected jeers boos and grunts of disbelief.

Next up was the wild and crazy radgepot Fern Brady, who recently tweeted how she wants to do a parody of Showgirls, is an ex-review writer who chose who to review by how much she fancied them. Good review = good shag, totally works apparently. Sound principles indeed! Fern’s balshy attitude to Guardian Soulmates, ‘tinder for posh people’ was a great icebreaker. We also discovered that Fern was a target of Twitter hash-taggers, whose cruel comments led her on an insecurity-fueled search for  hand-reduction surgery… such self-depreciating humour is a strength she expertly exploits Hearing Fern’s tales of falling in love with the biological dad & other such neurotic delights was a pleasing contrast to Joe’s weak warm up, and her witty observances made me think of Lena Dunham of Tiny Furniture and Girls fame. Fern is fearless in her content and well worth tuning in to.

Next up was primary-teaching joke-slinger John McGoldrick, who lives in a house with a holocaust-survivor & a poet who never flushes the toilet. When they are not arguing about peeing over the dishes they go to west end poetry nights where everyone, ‘ drinks smoothies and are aff their tits on kale’ John’s a witty fellow, with his jokes delivered with a lively & novel, yet  well-rehearsed deadpan monologue. Good stuff.

By far the funniest act of the night, with their incredibly sharp ‘make it up as we go along’ routine were Stu Murphy and Garry Dobson.Their improv had the audience in stitches as they worked their way through the alphabet combining romance scenes, sci-fi, western & period drama genres. ‘Do you dispose upon yourself to speak to me?’ is equally as funny as the Speedy Gonzalan accent, ‘It’s not racist if it’s accurate.’

Highlight of the night was Ben Norris. A nostaligic anecdotal romp through childhood; with many a pop at Jimmy Saville en route. He also came out with a cracking one liner; who declared that he has three nine-year old children & ‘it was nightmare when they were 6.’

Norris also like a good ol’ sing-song, & his hunt-sab number , ‘Sticking up for Mr.Fox,’ sung in Billy Bragg style was highly entertaining. To this we must add many an canny observation of life in our techno-modern times with a dollop of audience interaction. Watching Norris = a sore jaw & I left in a jolly good mood, still chuff’d that at the Stand the phrase ‘never a dull moment;‘ is still guaranteed.

Reviewer : Clare Crines